Posted in Tanzania by Michelle Euperio on 7/19/2010
Rumor has it that the 6 month out of the 11 months is always one of the hardest. The 6th month is about the time that people start to feel homesick, that people want to go home that people become tired of living this crazy, beautiful gypsy-esque lifestyle. It's known as "The Hump Month" because its a bit past halfway.
Month 6 for me was fabulous. We were in Kenya and I loved the ministry. Loved the People. Loved the time there....Sometimes I tend to process things a bit slower... enter Month 7-Tanzania. I've been in Mwanza for 3 weeks now and starting week 4...
Here is an honest account of what life is for me now. It's not all roses and peaches. It's not all beautiful every single moment. Overall-it's beautiful but sometimes I think it's the imperfections that make something as beautiful as it is. It's hard and I hope in me being honest that I don't offend anyone. One thing they emphasize this year is community and being real, open, honest and vulnerable.
So here I am... raw.
I knew coming into this month it was going to be a bit harder because it was going to be 5 weeks of ministry. One week more than the typical but sometimes a week can feel like months, but then some days a week can feel like a day.
I came into Tanzania and I was physically sick. I had fevers, body aches, earaches...I never get sick and I felt like death for a week or so.
Ministry is spiritually draining. Ministry consists of doing door-to-door evangelism in the mornings and open-air market preaching at night time. Open-air consists of preaching in the middle of a market with people around listening. There is also children's school on Saturdays and then at least 7 different services to preach at on Sundays.
At the beginning of the month, I asked God to show me how to unconditionally love like him. What a hard lesson that I didn't even realize the worth of what I was praying for.
As a team leader, my job is to love and encourage my team. Sounds easy and it usually is but in these past weeks- it has been one of the hardest things ever. It's hard to love and encourage the team when I feel like I have loved as much as I can. It's hard to love and encourage when I am not feeling loved and encouraged but by one person on the team. I can only pour out so much before running on empty.
Recently, my team has had problems in regard to preferring each other and really encouraging each other to greatness. I hate that I make myself carry the burden of all of the problems of the group on me. I hate when people don't get along. Yes, I can help just a bit but I can't force people to love each other. I can't force people to solve their problems. I can't force people to love me the way that I feel that I need. I felt helpless. I didn't know what else to do. I let the stress of everyone and everything get to me.
Notice that there is a lot of "I" trying to do things. I'm learning that I need to depend more on the Lord for guidance and strength. The reason why I am burned out is because I've been loving on my own strength and I just can't do it anymore. The more that I love him the easier it will be to love others.
Team Ridiculous has overcome a lot in this past week. It's great to see them start to really love each other and for more vulnerability to come out.
In this time of need of different things, I re-evaluated my life and realized that what I felt the team was doing to me was what I have been doing with the Lord. It helped me have a newfound love and appreciation for my team. It also humbled me and made me stand in awe of how much God is so incredible and how undeserving I am.
God loves me even when I am not chasing after him. God loves me even when I am being selfish and think my ways are best. God loves me when I choose everything but him. God loves with all his heart and sacrificed his own son.
What have I had to give up? Not much. Unconditional love....That is how I need to love others...with all my heart and all my soul. I was not loving my team and others nearly as much as I should have.
In this time, I have also learned that yes I feel loved when I hear words of affirmation but ultimately I need to be digging into the Lord for that and not looking to people around me. I am also learning a lesson in pride. It's been hard for me to ask for help this month or to be real with my emotions and not put on "a happy face" because I think that's what everyone wants.
God tells me who I am daily...I just need to be digging into him more and seeking who he says I am.
This month thus far has been hard. I've missed people more than ever. I've missed home. I've missed the comforts of America, but I know that God has me here for a purpose and my mission here is not done.
It just amazes me that as crappy as I can be- He still loves me and desires me and chooses me to do this. I am so unworthy and so undeserving of such a great love. I am so undeserving to love and lead 6 other individuals but I praise God for giving me the strength and guidance to do so and filling my heart with his love to love his children.
Sex and the City was a series about a writer and her best
friends and their fabulous lives in New York City. Carrie Bradshaw, leading
lady, wrote advice columns about "the single girl living the New York life."
Just call me Carrie Bradshaw of the The World Race... but not
because I happen to love the Lord, love my name and the fact that I am traveling to different places.
Some similarities, many differences and I know with full
confidence that I will never be able to pull off some of the amazing outfits
that she wears well.
I have been in Nairobi, Kenya for the past month. I am
sitting on the couch in my fabulous black and white shirt dress with fabulous
giant white earrings.
Why the fabulous outfit? My staple sweatpants, jeans and
t-shirts that I have worn consistently for the past 3 weeks have attained an
undeniably stench and are being washed and are probably hanging up to dry right
now.
Deliverance Church Southlands passes out a Sunday program
with announcements, songs that will be sung during service and a devotional
thought that takes up an entire page. I have had the priveledge to write the
devotionals since being here.
Two years ago, I had every single career move already
planned. Many of my blogs talk about my past desire to be an entertainment TV
reporter. I knew that I was going to be
a reporter for a small town, move up to bigger cities through the years and
eventually be on the sidelines doing red carpet interviews alongside Ryan
Seacrest.
...never did I think I'd be writing spiritual encouraging
things for a church bulletin in Kenya...
Couple of things that I have learned from my degree: I love
people and that everyone has a story. I
also love speaking to a group.
After graduation, my desire to be a reporter was kinda
thrown out the window. I thought that my four year degree was a waste.
Nothing is ever a waste.
I told my full testimony to my new team and was encouraged
about what God is doing in my life and I was encouraged that I am blessed
enough to call these lovely individuals my family.
Ricki said that my "weaknessess" are not weakness and a lot
of my strength is seen in telling my story. Telling my story is important.
Kendall said that a reporter speaks to the masses. God gave
me that passion for a reason and that I would still be speaking to masses but
in a completely different way.
Erin said that a reporter gathers information and reports
information to people... God speaks to me and uses that and the gift of prophecy.
I gather what he says and reports it to others.
I am a Reporter for the Lord!
I know that God had me go through journalism to understand
how he speaks to me. So no, I'm not a small town reporter, or on E! News but I
am speaking to nations.
I may not be standing in front of a camera, but I know that
I don't have the need to impress those watching me anymore.
I may not be wearing a fabulous designer gown interviewing
Gerald Butler or Britney Spears, but I am meeting Jesus in the hearts of
amazing children, lovely widows, beautiful women who sell themselves and in the
eyes of strangers.
I would not choose to live my life in any other way. I love
what God is doing in my life. I love how God is using me.
I'm in love. Our love is better and bigger than any "Big."
And just like Carrie Bradshaw, I have an amazing support system... I'm finally
living life and I am fabulous in my own way.
The only difference is... my life is not a fictional story.
I just gave a sermon about being a Fool for God, Crazy for Christ... Out of my mind for HIM.
I spoke about how sometimes we live in our own foolishness and worldly things and we think the foolish ways of the world are right.
The other type of fool is the CRAZY ridiculous way of living for God. Who cares what people think of you???? Who cares if they think you should be doing something else or living the "American Dream?" If you are pleasing God, then that's all that matters. So what if you're "awkward" or different or silly or random? God made me that way. I have finally learned to be confident in the way he designed me-awkwardness and everything.
2 Corinthians 5:13, "If it seems that we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right minds it is for you. For whatever we do, it's because Christ's love compels us."
Oooh yes. Christ's love compels me. God is a mighty crazy God and his love can and should drive us to do mighty and crazy things.
When I decided to do the Race, people said I was crazy. They said I was crazy because I wouldn't be making money for a year. They said I was crazy because I wouldn't be home for a year. I was crazy for even wanting to do this.
If you told me 2 years ago that I would be in Kenya pouring my heart out to strangers who have become family in just weeks... I would think that is CRAZY!
God called me to live this life for him.
I find the more obedient you are to his craziness, the more willing he is to use you to bring glory to his kingdom.
"Michelle, ask those strangers if you can pray for them..."
"Go sit on a bench and make my love known.."
"Love the woman who sells her body to provide.."
"Feel their pain..."
"Place your hands on them and believe in the power of healing..."
"Comfort that stranger..."
"Speak to the nations..."
The Lord told me a while back that I would "SPEAK TO THE NATIONS..." As a reporter, I thought that would only mean to large crowds... never did I ever think different countries or different peoples. That was too crazy to even fathom.
Along with the crazy talk between me and God...
I shower once a week because we don't have continuous running water.
I have settled to take a baby wipe shower if I get that itchy.
My feet look like they have a Chaco tan but those are just perma-dirt lines.
Somehow I've packed books, toiletries, clothes, my tent and sleeping bag into my backpack weighing a total of 40 pounds.
I have eaten beans and rice for every meal since getting to Africa.
I have been on the best diet plan without having to diet this year.
I wear clothes from the dirty clothes pile.
I have no shame in wearing the same outfit 2 days or more in a row.
I live and work with my family 24-7 causing us to strongly dislike, love, rejoice and cry with each other in every single moment of our lives.
Those are just few things that may seem crazy but God calls me to do these things on almost a daily basis. This is my life. It would be weird not to be living this way.
Things that may have seemed too crazy and impossible have become possible.
Through God, I am speaking to nations. I am healing the sick. I am prophesying to those that need to hear his words. I am being comfort to my brothers and sisters worldwide.
I am crazy in love with a crazy God who crazily loves me back.
As Britney says, "You think I'm Crazy.. I got your Crazy." hehe
Stop caring about what others think and be a crazy fool for the one that already thinks the world of you.
I was spit in the face.... Okay so not literally with drool or saliva or like New York did to Pumpkin... but with words and dirty looks.
This month we are with Deliverance Church Southlands in Nairobi. I love love love it. Ministry is different every day. Ministry can consist of going to speak to children at schools, visiting people with disabilities, practicing with the church dance team, teaching English, preaching, music ministry, door-to-door evangelism and a plethora of things.
Door-to-door evangelism. The mere thought of it makes me shudder. I'm reminded of people back home who go door-to-door trying to sell Tupperware, blenders or encyclopedias. I'm not selling anything-just putting my heart on the line in hopes that people know of God's love.
In the few times that we have gone out for door-to-door ministry, most people have been very receptive. They have welcomed me in their homes, offered a cup of tea and I have had the opportunity to pray with such amazing brothers and sisters. Many of the times the people I have met have been more encouraging than I could have ever been for them.
Yesterday was different. People shut their doors on us. People gave us dirty looks. People ran in the other direction. When asked if I could pray for a woman, she said, "What makes you think that your prayers will be heard and not mine?"
Their words and actions felt as degrading as spit in my face.
The very first day of door-to-door ministry, our dear friend from the church, James said, "In doing this ministry we are like Jesus-just trying to show God's love to everyone and if we are persecuted we are blessed enough to be even more like him."
I looked down at my dirty feet in my Chacos (my Dad calls them Jesus shoes) and I thought, "Hmm. I am like Jesus today! He is allowing me to be his hands and feet. I will not be discouraged. God I can't do this without you. Show me your love and show me how to love them like you."
The day did get better but it was just a humbling way to learn that when Jesus lived it wasn't all peaches and sunshine.
It was also a beautiful reminder that God's grace and love are unconditional. No matter how many times I have "spit in his face" and told him that my selfish ways are better.. he still continues to chase after me.
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." -2 Corinthians 12: 9-10
We are in Nairobi, Kenya and I absolutely love love love it! We are partnered up with Deliverance Church Southlands and actually staying with Pastor Joseph and his wife, Mercy and their most adorable 3-year old daughter, Patience.
We will be doing ministry alongside the church-leading worship with the youth group, attending church services, praying with police officers, and ministering to those in and around the community.
This church for the past 5 years has applied to to receive Operation Christmas Child/Samaritan's Purse gifts to give to the children in the neighborhood. For our first day of ministry we were asked to help pass out the presents and hang out with the children. I got to lead an old fashioned game of Simon Says!
I LOVE KENYA!!!!
The people here are just beautiful. The land is just beautiful. KENYA IS JUST BEAUTIFUL!!!! At the end of May, God revealed to me that he would restore my heart, restore my soul and restore HIS joy back into me...especially after bar ministry and human trafficking were so difficult-mentally, emotionally and spiritually-He would restore me and then overflow.
Even in these past few days, God is restoring my heart in ways I never thought he would. Pastor Joseph, the entire congregation and everyone I have met has been such an encouragement. My prayer this month is to have the JOY OF THE LORD!!!! I WANT TO WALK. I WANT TO DANCE. I WANT TO BASK IN THE JOY OF THE LORD!!!!!!!
Here is my first day of ministry and one of the many reasons why I already love Africa so so so so much. ;) AFRICA IS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you so much for the support that you have given me through these past 6 months through prayers and financially. God has moved me and has dramatically changed my life. I am a new woman and I never want to go back to who I was. God has given me confidence to see myself the way he sees me. I am madly in love with my King.
......so I need $2,050 to stay on the RACE........
Please support me if you can. If you have wanted to financially support me but never knew when was the right time...that would be now. :) I know that my God is an awesome God who provides for me and I have full confidence that this is what and where the Lord desires me to be. Consider the price of 1 Starbucks coffee or a McDonalds meal... that would feed me for about 3 days.... I'm for real... I have no shame... I'll take that pocket change! ;)
<----- To donate, click on the SUPPORT ME tab.. or click here and be sure it says Michelle Euperio. love you.
Posted in Thailand by Michelle Euperio on 5/30/2010
I love names. I love name meanings. Names are beautiful and so important. It's what God has chosen you to be called. We are each his precious sons and daughters and many of the times we live out to what our name means.
I met Yor in Patong, Thailand. When I think of Thailand, I will forever think of Yor. In previous months before the race and even praying during this past month, I asked God to give me his heart for one.
I had no idea what I prayed and what I was asking for.
I cried for this woman on a daily basis. I loved this woman more than I have ever loved anyone else. My heart broke for her and still breaks for her.
Casondra, Ricki and Hope ran into her and she told them how much she loved me, that I was her daughter and that she missed me. My heart rejoiced!!!! Not that I need confirmation from God saying that what I am doing is what he desired but it was a beautiful and humble blessing to know that she loved me as much as I loved her.
This entire month God has given me a vision of a woman crawling back to God-bruised, battered and broken. Her mouth was bleeding, she had long black hair but her face was unseen. Through the month, I just assumed, "Oh, yay! Yor will fall in love with Jesus."
On the second to last day of ministry, God revealed to me that the woman in the vision was me. I crawled into his arms and he said, "Yor is yours. I am well pleased and now I will restore you."
This month has been a battle-a full out battle against Satan and his army in the darkness. I have never been so tired, so dependent on the Lord and broken. I have never felt such heaviness in a place. I have never had the heart to fight for someone until Yor. I fought against lies of doing enough and loving enough.
I asked God about the vision he gave me and why my mouth was bleeding. He said, "Because you spoke truth and love and that's where Satan tried to get you the most."
God's heart has wrecked me. I honestly would never want to feel this heartbreak ever again but if it makes me more like HIM-then bring it on. I know that God has both of our hearts and is healing mine while he is taking care of her.
The heartbreak and the pain is worth it. Yor is worth it. Love is worth it.
I got a tattoo that says "Let your light shine" in Thai on my arm. I asked Yor what it meant and she said, "Your light comes from Heaven."
Hmmm. Close.
Michelle means, "One who is like God." God gave me a beautiful gift this month- his heart for Yor. This month was the first month where I have fought and learned to live up to my name meaning.
Yor is God's. She is his precious beloved woman that I have had the privilege of knowing and getting to know. I will forever have this connection with a woman who sold her body in attempt to provide for a better life for her family. My Thailand is YOR and when I think of this country, I will think of Yor. I will forever love her. It's not my job to worry about her but I have faith that my amazing God will love her more than I ever could and passionately pursue her the way she deserves.
Yor means "God is exalted".....and yes he is!
I love that a woman whose name means "God is exalted" taught me how to be "One who is like God."
Posted in Thailand by Michelle Euperio on 5/26/2010
One of my favorite movies of all time is Pretty Woman with Julia Roberts. I couldn't help but think of some of the similarities with what I have seen on Bangla Road.
They're beautiful women.
They prostitute themselves.
They can be bought for a price for a period of time to be a date or tour guide around the area.
They are bought clothes and go to extravagant places that they wouldn't have been able to if it weren't for him.
They say they won't be affected by this male's attention but inevitably when he leaves, she is heart broken.
Yet it's the differences that really stood out.
Vivian gets her fairy-tale ending. Edward falls madly in love with her and supposedly they live happily ever after. Julia Roberts portrays a character. This isn't her life. For the women that I met, this is their life. This is how they know how to put food on the table, to pay for her daughter's cell phone minutes, to pay for her son's dream of being a doctor or to take care of years of family debt.
They dream about leaving and having a man save them from this job that can easily be and has been portrayed as glamorous.
The original intention of Pretty Woman was not meant to be a romantic comedy. In the original ending, Edward literally drops her off somewhere on the street and she is begging him to love her. He leaves her with all the boxes of clothing and goods he bought and she falls asleep sobbing-alone in the streets with the memory of false love and gifts that were purchased.
People thought that the ending was too harsh and wanted to leave feeling great. Isn't that how everyone wants to feel about life-that we all live happily ever after? That it's all roses and peaches?
Yes the ending may have been too harsh but it's realistic. It's real life. It happens. Daily, women in Patong are left heartbroken, sad and lonely because of the false promises of love or affection the men showed or because of movies like Pretty Woman.
Some boys take a beautiful girl.
Only hide her away from the rest of the world...
...that's all they really want.
Those girls they wanna have fun.
Contrary to popular belief, Girls do not only "wanna have fun." They want and deserve more. They want and desire love. Their fairy tale ending can only be found in the Prince of Peace, the greatest love-God Almighty. I pray that these women stop hoping for someone to sweep them away and realize that God is already absolutely in love with them.
Check out the video that Keet and Lauren made: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. It's just a glimpse of the beautiful women in Patong.
Posted in Thailand by Michelle Euperio on 5/17/2010
When I think of the term best friend, my mind begins to dream of cute little girls in a field of daisies, twirling in their pink and white dresses, blowing the petals off flowers-laughing and just enjoying each other's company.
Yor and I are not in a field of daisies. We're in the middle of Bangla Road amidst lust, alcohol and sex yet by the grace of God we have been able to enjoy each other's company and just laugh with each other.
Yor is one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen with a smile so bright that could light up the entire street. She is 43 but doesn't look a day over 22. She's about 5'0 feet tall but has a personality that's the size of a giant.
She had been married to the love of her life for about 25 years and he was killed in a motorcycle accident 3 years ago. She was a cook in a restaurant for most of her life. She loves cooking Pad Thai and she has 2 sons... one 16-who "needs" braces and the other 18- studying at University to become a doctor.
When I met her, she had only been working for 2 nights. She hates her job but loves her sons so much that she is willing to sacrifice her body to pay for school and braces. They have no idea she works there nor she thinks they care.
My heart broke when she told me her story, when I saw a man who didn't love her hold her in her arms and she looked at me with sadness and helplessness.
My heart broke when she gave me a look of surprise and shouted forth joy after I said I wanted to be her friend and that I loved her.
My heart broke when she told me how much money she needs to pay for the bills and her debt monthly and the idea of how many times she would have to be viewed as a sexual object to pay for rent, food, braces and tuition.
My broken heart broke into more pieces when she rejected me when I asked to do lunch and she said,"I don't know if I will be bought tonight. I don't know about tomorrow "
We all can't guarantee tomorrow but because of this job she doesn't know if she will have other "obligations."
My already broken heart shattered into a million more pieces when she left the arms of a man to tell me,"He bought me. I was bought for the next 10 days."
I ran out of the bar weeping. Every other time I waited until I was at home by myself but I couldn't hide my pain. Some of the women from our squad began to pray for me. People began to ask others around me what was the matter. I didn't care. I have never felt heartbreak like that ever.
Imagine if your mom, sister, cousin or best friend was BOUGHT for a period of time. Imagine for the equivalent of $10 a night, losing your right to humanity and becoming a sex object.
Yor is the mother of two, she is someone's sister and she is my friend.
God says we are priceless but some value people to be the price of only 2 McDonald's meals.
My heart not only breaks for her but it broke for him and the other men out in Patong trying to search after meaningless sex and cheap gratification.
"God, what happened to these men? Who hurt them? What happened in their life that denied them the right to be the men of God you destined them to be? I can't hate him because my heart hurts for him too. I feel rejected, discouraged and sad. What am I supposed to do now? I love her. I loved her the minute she smiled at me. I love her."
Fight for this woman. Show her my love. Pursue her the same way I pursue you.
I was immediately reminded of the time I went to Mr. Hambley's class before leaving to do the race and speaking about how and why I desire to fight for these women (check the blog out here).
"Because my problems are nothing in comparison to what theirs are and they have a right to a better life and if one woman was freed from this--EVEN IF IT CAUSED MY LIFE, IT WOULD BE WORTH IT. JUST ONE."
Yor's the one.
She is "purchased" until the 20th and we leave on the 22. I pray that we will be able to see each other again. The only thing I can do is pray, but it's also the best thing I can do. My heart breaks yet again at the thought of not being able to see her, but nonetheless- God is good and he has a perfect plan.
Pray for the man and his heart that he begins to see her as a woman. Pray for her safety. Pray that she doesn't get seduced by this lifestyle. Pray that she realizes her worth and pray that she will know of a love greater than any earthly love she could ever find.
Misty Edwards keeps running through my head.
You won't relent until You have it all
My heart is Yours
God is relentless. She may be "purchased" for 10 days but God has purchased her sins and deems her wonderful, beautiful, lovely and WORTHY.
I fought before I knew a name or a face but the battle will be won knowing it's Yor.
Posted in Thailand by Michelle Euperio on 5/10/2010
I'm in Phuket, Thailand for the beautiful month of May. This month we are teamed up with the all women's team, Fullness of One and partnering with SHE ministries. Dearest Drew and Brian are with the other men of M squad where they will be doing MANISTRY in the jungle.
SHE ministries is Self Help and Empowerment and they provide women training for better job opportunities such as baking, candy making, jewelry making, English classes and hotel training rather than working in bars or selling their bodies.
We along with some YWAMers (Denver, Orlando and Montana) are fighting and battling against human trafficking this month here in Patong.
This whole ministry is different than any other ministry that I have done in the past. Our ministry hours are about 8-12pm with about 3 hour debriefs when we get back home. We spend our days resting and resting in the Lord preparing for the battle. We are going to bars every night in hopes to show people real love. I'm quickly reminded of my past life of frequenting bars but this time with a whole different purpose-to bring Christ's light in the darkest of places and to love our brothers and sisters. I am being called to love my sister who hides behind the fake smile who sells her body thinking that this is the only way of means to live. I am being called to love my brother who sees the woman as a sex object that will temporarily fill his void of lonliness, love and lust. Nonetheless, I have never gone to a bar in hopes to become best friends with a woman who sells her body.
YWAM Montana (who named their band, Band of Living Waters) is so ridiculously musically talented and our contact set it up for them to lead worship in a bar called Coyote. I'll say that again...
The colors of the morning are inside Your eyes
The world awakens in the light of the day
I look up to the sky and say
You're beautiful
God said, "This is my song for you. This is our song." I began weeping in the middle of the bar and just in awe of how much God loves me. Weeping in a bar. Not drunk, not on anything but just basking in the LOVE of GOD.
I thought "How did I get to this?" I was quickly reminded that one of the last times I asked that very question I was down on my knees begging God to take away my insecurities away after starving myself for about a week in attempt to be "beautiful." I asked him if I was even worthy enough to just sit as his feet.
...and now here I am in the middle of the bar somehow falling more in love with my God and fully confident in knowing that his love has redeemed me in so many ways.
I prayed for my sisters out there in Patong. I prayed that they would see their worth and how beautiful and how much in love God was with each one of them.
The band sang "God of this City" next which was actually written about the red light district in Thailand.
For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done here
I have faith and confidence that yes greater things are yet to come and that these women will finally get to experience the true love that they seek after, desire and deserve...not from an earthly man but from the God Almighty.
If God can deem me-a mess of a woman who daily makes mistakes, who used to hate herself and struggled with identity...Deem me as his precious daughter more than worthy to sit not at his feet but by his side than he can and will absolutely deem each every one of my sisters out there more than worthy, lovely, precious and beautiful. We are his BELOVED.
God wins. He always wins. As his army...We are bringing HOPE to the hopeless... PEACE to the Restless .....and LIGHT in the darkness. I have full faith that greater things are yet to come and greater things will be done in Patong because there is no one like our GOD.
As a team leader, my job is to love and encourage my team. Sounds easy and it usually is but in these past weeks- it has been one of the hardest things ever. It's hard to love and encourage the team when I feel like I have loved as much as I can. It's hard to love and encourage when I am not feeling loved and encouraged but by one person on the team. I can only pour out so much before running on empty. 
Sex and the City was a series about a writer and her best
friends and their fabulous lives in New York City. Carrie Bradshaw, leading
lady, wrote advice columns about "the single girl living the New York life."
I know that God had me go through journalism to understand
how he speaks to me. So no, I'm not a small town reporter, or on E! News but I
am speaking to nations.
The other type of fool is the CRAZY ridiculous way of living for God. Who cares what people think of you???? Who cares if they think you should be doing something else or living the "American Dream?" If you are pleasing God, then that's all that matters. So what if you're "awkward" or different or silly or random? God made me that way. I have finally learned to be confident in the way he designed me-awkwardness and everything.
This month we are with Deliverance Church Southlands in Nairobi. I love love love it. Ministry is different every day. Ministry can consist of going to speak to children at schools, visiting people with disabilities, practicing with the church dance team, teaching English, preaching, music ministry, door-to-door evangelism and a plethora of things.
I looked down at my dirty feet in my Chacos (my Dad calls them Jesus shoes) and I thought, "Hmm. I am like Jesus today! He is allowing me to be his hands and feet. I will not be discouraged. God I can't do this without you. Show me your love and show me how to love them like you."
We are in Nairobi, Kenya and I absolutely love love love it! We are partnered up with Deliverance Church Southlands and actually staying with Pastor Joseph and his wife, Mercy and their most adorable 3-year old daughter, Patience.
I love names. I love name meanings. Names are beautiful and so important. It's what God has chosen you to be called. We are each his precious sons and daughters and many of the times we live out to what our name means.
I got a tattoo that says "Let your light shine" in Thai on my arm. I asked Yor what it meant and she said, "Your light comes from Heaven."
One of my favorite movies of all time is Pretty Woman with Julia Roberts. I couldn't help but think of some of the similarities with what I have seen on Bangla Road.
When I think of the term best friend, my mind begins to dream of cute little girls in a field of daisies, twirling in their pink and white dresses, blowing the petals off flowers-laughing and just enjoying each other's company.
My already broken heart shattered into a million more pieces when she left the arms of a man to tell me,
I was immediately reminded of the time I went to Mr. Hambley's class before leaving to do the race and speaking about how and why I desire to fight for these women 
This whole ministry is different than any other ministry that I have done in the past. Our ministry hours are about 8-12pm with about 3 hour debriefs when we get back home. We spend our days resting and resting in the Lord preparing for the battle. We are going to bars every night in hopes to show people real love. I'm quickly reminded of my past life of frequenting bars but this time with a whole different purpose-to bring Christ's light in the darkest of places and to love our brothers and sisters. I am being called to love my sister who hides behind the fake smile who sells her body thinking that this is the only way of means to live. I am being called to love my brother who sees the woman as a sex object that will temporarily fill his void of lonliness, love and lust. Nonetheless, I have never gone to a bar in hopes to become best friends with a woman who sells her body.
I prayed for my sisters out there in Patong. I prayed that they would see their worth and how beautiful and how much in love God was with each one of them. 
